Question 1

When do I use "whom"?

Accepted Answer

Use whom when the pronoun is the object of a verb or preposition — when something is done to it. After prepositions (to, for, with, of), use whom: "to whom it may concern." As the object of a verb, also whom: "whom did you see?" In ordinary speech, most people reach for who in both slots — but careful prose still preserves the distinction. If you picture the sentence as an arrow, who sits at the tail (the doer) and whom sits at the head (the target). Cover letters, formal emails, and legal prose are the places where getting this right still matters; novels and news writing have mostly relaxed. Exception: In spoken English, almost every whom slot is filled by who without anybody noticing. The distinction is a written-prose rule more than a speaking rule.

Question 2

What's the difference between "who" and "whom"?

Accepted Answer

Who is the subject — it does the action. Whom is the object — the action happens to it.

Question 3

Is it "who to blame" or "whom to blame"?

Accepted Answer

"Whom to blame." The blame is being done to someone — the object slot calls for whom.

Question 4

Is it "who should I call" or "whom should I call"?

Accepted Answer

Strictly, "whom should I call" — the caller is doing the calling to someone.